Onward Bound Humor

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Wednesday, March 08, 2006

146. Perforrmance Evaluations

Some quotes from actual performance evaluations:

"Since my last report, this employee has hit rock bottom and started to dig"
"His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity"
"I would not allow this employee to breed"
"This associate is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definitely
won't be"
"Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap"
"When she opens her mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever
foot was previously there"
"He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle"
"This young lady has delusions of adequacy"
"He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them"
"This employee should go far and the sooner he starts, the better"
"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot"