20. From "The Office" web page

STRESS MANAGEMENT VISUALIZATION
Picture yourself near a stream.
Birds are chirping softly in the crisp, cool mountain air.
Nothing can bother you here.
No one knows this secret place.
You are in total seclusion from that place called 'the world.'
The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity.
The water is clear.
You can easily make out the face of the person whose head you're holding under the water.
There now... Feeling better?

Know your limitations and be content with them. Too much ambition results in promotion to a job you can't do.

Every time you open your mouth you have this wonderful ability to continually confirm what I think.

The art of management is to realise your deficiencies, and hide them.

If you treat the people around you with love and respect, they will never guess that you're trying to get them sacked.

If at first you don't succeed, remove all evidence you ever tried.

Who can they say "Am I intelligent"? I'll tell you who - someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture and not think of the Lone Ranger.

Of course I don't look busy.I did it right the first time.

"Always remember, when you're looking up your top is someone else's bottom." (DPG)