Onward Bound Humor

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Thursday, December 01, 2005

43. Christmas Carols for Psychiatrists

1. SCHIZOPHRENIA: Do You Hear What I Hear?

2. MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER: We Three Kings Disoriented Are.

3. DEMENTIA: I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas.

4. NARCISSISTIC: Hark, the Herald Angels Sing About Me.

5. MANIC: Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and FireHydrants and . . .

6. PARANOID: Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me.

7. PERSONALITY DISORDER: You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why.

8. DEPRESSION: Silent Anhedonia, Holy Anhedonia, All Is Flat, All Is Lonely.

9. OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER: Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bells...

10. PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PERSONALITY: On The First Day of Christmas My True Love Gave To Me (and then took it all away).

11. BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER: Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire. (All)

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